Square Root Three

I’m sure that I will always be
A lonely number like root three
The three is all that’s good and right,
Why must my three keep out of sight
Beneath the vicious square root sign,
I wish instead I were a nine
For nine could thwart this evil trick,
with just some quick arithmetic
I know I’ll never see the sun, as 1.7321
Such is my reality, a sad irrationality
When hark! What is this I see,

Graduation

ps: I know this is kind of late, but I have actually written it on graduation day . I just did not publish it till now for whatever reason...

Four years after our formal inauguration,
we hereby gather here once again for our commencement.
Some of us may wonder why isn't it called convocation?
To put it simply lets just call it our graduation!

Over these years we formed many friendships,
with some even developing into romantic relationships.
Hope that our bonds continues to run deep,
as we leave with many wonderful memories that we will keep.

Funny stories to tell many years later,
us being part of the same alma mater.
To the real world now, let us prove our mettle!
Jobstreet here we come, don't forget your cover letters.

your future in your hands?

Is your future really in your hands? Hmmm... I would like to think so. However, at this point of time, this statement seemed to slowly fade away from the truth as I see my future slowly slipping away from my control.

Why? I feel very tired of playing this what do you want to be, what are your career objectives kinda game. What is wrong? Am i too weak, too sheltered, ignorant or afraid? Fuck I feel lousy.

I am applying for engineering positions not because I like/love engineering, but simply because I feel that I have no other fucking options. I don't like approaching people, being pretentious and try to sell them stuff. So sales-related jobs like insurance and financial planning is out for me. I thought of working in a bank but no-one would interview me. I think its because I have absolutely no finance or banking or what kinda business background or even general knowledge. What else can I do man. How?

Now I fear forever being condemned to a technical position which I won't be good at and suffering with a job that I will not like for the rest of my life. This sucks. It is destroying my life, robbing me of my sleep, and turning me into a moody, melancholic piece of shit that no-one likes to talk to.

ok I am ranting, shoot me.

You might be an engineer if...

If you introduce your wife as " mylady@home.wife"

If your spouse sends you an e-mail instead of calling you to dinner

If you can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie

If you want an 8X CDROM for Christmas

If Dilbert is your hero

If you stare at an orange juice container because it says CONCENTRATE

If you can name 6 Star Trek episodes

If the only jokes you receive are through e-mail

If your wrist watch has more computing power than a 486DX-50

If your idea of good interpersonal communication means getting the decimal point in the right place

If you look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys

If you use a CAD package to design your son's Pine Wood Derby car

If you have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts

If, at Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string

If you window shop at Radio Shack

If your ideal evening consists of fast-forwarding through the latest sci-fi movie looking for technical inaccuracies

If you have "Dilbert" comics displayed anywhere in your work area

If you carry on a one-hour debate over the expected results of a test that actually takes five minutes to run

If you are convinced you can build a phazer out of your garage door opener and your camera's flash attachment

If you don't even know where the cover to your personal computer is

If you have modified your can-opener to be microprocessor driven

If you know the direction the water swirls when you flush

If you own "Official Star Trek" anything

If you have ever taken the back off your TV just to see what's inside

If a team of you and your co-workers have set out to modify the antenna on the radio in your work area for better reception

If you thought the concoction ET used to phone home was stupid

If you ever burned down the gymnasium with your Science Fair project

If you are currently gathering the components to build your own nuclear reactor

If you own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts

If you have never backed-up your hard drive

If you are aware that computers are actually only good for playing games, but are afraid to say it out loud

If you truly believe aliens are living among us

If you have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance

If you have ever purchased an electronic appliance "as-is"

If you see a good design and still have to change it

If the salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions

If you still own a slide rule and you know how to work it

If the thought that a CD could refer to finance or music never enters your mind

If you own a set of itty-bitty screw drivers, but you don't remember where they are

If you rotate your screen savers more frequently than your automobile tires

If you have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal

If you have more toys than your kids

If you need a checklist to turn on the TV

If you have introduced your kids by the wrong name

If your wife thinks your taste in ties is bizarre

If you have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work

If your I.Q. number is bigger than your weight

If the microphone or visual aids at a meeting don't work and you rush up to the front to fix it

If you can remember 7 computer passwords but not your anniversary

If you have memorized the program schedule for the Discovery channel and have seen most of the shows already

If you have ever owned a calculator with no equal key and know what RPN stands for

If your father sat 2 inches in front of your family's first color TV with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors, and you grew up thinking that was normal

If you know how to take the cover off of your computer, and what size screw driver to use

If you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting

If people groan at the party when you pick out the music

If you can't remember where you parked your car for the 3rd time this week

If people hound you for pocket protectors at Halloween time

If you did the sound system for your senior prom

If your checkbook always balances

If your girlfriend says the way you dress is no reflection on her

If your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone

If you have more friends on the Internet than in real life

If you thought the real heroes of "Apollo 13" were the mission controllers

If you think your computer looks better without the cover

If you think that when people around you yawn, its because they didn't get enough sleep

If your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work

If you spend more on your home computer than your car

If you know what http:/ stands for

If you've ever tried to repair a $5.00 radio

If you have a neatly sorted collection of old bolts and nuts in your garage

If your favorite part of the 6 o clock news is comparing their latest satellite weather picture with yours

If your three year old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory

If your lap-top computer costs more than your car

If your 4 basic food groups are: 1.Caffeine 2.Fat 3.Sugar 4.Chocolate

Transformers

Who's interested?

camera test

bored and decided to see if my phone camera really sucks that bad or not....

like a rolling stone...

How does it feel

How does it feel

To be on your own

With no direction home

Like a complete unknown

Like a rolling stone?

sinking

I don't want to be mediocre....
The truth hurts...



finally.........................................................................................

Brave New World

These guys rocked my socks off!!!!! 

free bird

If I leave here tomorrow
Would you still remember me?
For I must be travelling on, now,
'Cause there's too many places I've got to see.
But, if I stayed here with you, girl,
Things just couldn't be the same.
'Cause I'm as free as a bird now,
And this bird you can not change.
Lord knows, I can't change.

Bye, bye, its been a sweet love.
Though this feeling I can't change.
But please don't take it badly,
'Cause Lord knows I'm to blame.
But, if I stayed here with you girl,
Things just couldn't be the same.
Cause I'm as free as a bird now,
And this bird you'll never change.
And this bird you can not change.
Lord knows, I can't change.
Lord help me, I can't change.

finally exercising...

Ok, today I finally stop procrastinating, decided that my stomach is too big, ass is too heavy, and I am turning into a couch potato (Hey i finished 22 episodes of Prison Break in less than 2 days).
So...

I headed down to the gym.

So when was the last time? Ok. I cannot remember the last time. Better start now than never, I don't want to be looking like a 50 year old when I am 35.

Did my usual weights, only this time I have to take about 20kg off every station. Lost it. Hougang gym has very friendly staff, a lot of people, not many equipment and absolutely no babes. Being alone can be therapeutic sometimes. I do my weights, listen to my ipod, and observe the people around me (ya I am kapoh lah, whatever).

There is this nice young chap teaching an 40 year old auntie how to work the abdominal station. A old Ah Seng with damn damn alot of tattoos over his old body (Think Michael Schofield from prison break). He seemed to be a regular there smiling at the ppl around him, saying hi-s here and there, something like... Oei hor bo... Oei.... long time never see i tot u see liao. Judging by his looks and size... he is definitely someone you don't want to make enemies with. Then, there are the usual school boys and school girls which are fathom are the more sporty types. I mean I don't recall heading to my neighborhood gym during my JC days. I use the school gym not so regularly.

So after the gym comes the 2.4km run. The last time was back in NUS year 1? Gasp! I picked the stadium to carry out this dreaded deed as the treadmill makes me dizzy and I if (touch wood) i collapse, there will be a lot of people to help me (I don't need to mention that the stadium too, is crowded, do I?). And so the marathon, opps no, short run commences.

Round 1: I am starting to feel the strains of the inner systems of my not so yet aging body.

Round 2: Shuccckssss do i really have to do 4 more rounds. My legs are wobbly from the earlier workout. Yes, I like to work on everything in the gym including legs and not like most other people, focus only on they upper bodies

Round 3: Halfway there! Focus Focus...... Ipod is playing my favorite song. I am feeling much healthier now thank you. I just want to breathe.

Round 4: #$!#%@!%!!!!! I think my lungs have shrunken over the years.

Round 5: even more $%@%^#@!!!!

Round 6: Go go go go go .... even more #%@%!!! Sprint Sprint.... in-subordination of my two lower limbs. Lungs screaming for air. I refused to breathe through my mouth. Weather is HOT..... finishing line is CLOSE.

Stopwatch timing? OH MY GOD... it shall be my little secret. I don't want to have to disappear from the face of the earth with shame.

Ok my body is seriously screwed up.... Time for another session sometime later this week.

Milo Dino

Ok so I got bored and decided to make myself a nice cup of Milo dinosaur. Basically, thats a huge, heap of Milo powder on top of your standard milo beverage.

What happens now is that unlike being in a coffeeshop, I have no luxury of a straw. So what I did was to put my lips on the edge of the cup and duh, tried drink my milo the traditional way. What happened next was that I need oxygen and my nose happens to breath in as well and before you know, I was choking with milo dust. Cough......

I can tell you, that was the most unpleasant experience ever. To have milo in your lungs! Chough...wheeeze... choke.... breahhh...
Why do I have this feeling that my life is turning into a comedy sitcom.

Mayoniase

Fool enough to almost be it
Cool enough to not quite see it
Doomed
Pick your pockets full of sorrow
And run away with me tomorrow
June

We'll try and ease the pain
But somehow we'll feel the same
Well, no one knows
Where our secrets go

I send a heart to all my dearies
When your life is so, so dreary
Dream
I'm rumored to the straight and narrow
While the harlots of my perils
Scream

And I fail
But when I can, I will
Try to understand
That when I can, I will

Mother weep the years I'm missing
All our time can't be given
Back
Shut my mouth and strike the demons
That cursed you and your reasons
Out of hand and out of season
Out of love and out of feeling
So bad

When I can, I will
Words defy the plans
When I can, I will

Fool enough to almost be it
And cool enough to not quite see it
And old enough to always feel this
Always old, I'll always feel this

No more promise no more sorrow
No longer will I follow
Can anybody hear me
I just want to be me
When I can, I will
Try to understand
That when I can, I will

job interview

Going for another job interview tomorrow: Prudential Management Trainee. Wondered what would the job specifications and requirements be? Got to find out tomorrow! Wish me luck!

Waking up to a kaleidoscopic mind,
a heart of emptiness u will find.
With every hour the clocks chime,
sometimes i felt really lost in time.

Come on does it really matter,
when everything seemed torn and tattered.
A lonely soul in a group of endless chatter,
always tasteless although from the same platter.

Clinging on to that little hope,
something small but it helps me cope.
Fear engulfs everytime I probe,
it felt like being on the wrong end of that breaking rope.

Bored....

Boring boring boring boring boring....

Its 1.39am and yet i can't get to sleep... too much on my mind...
Seems like nature has a way of throwing shit at me...

Its late into the night.
Sleepless despite trying with all my might.
Is it really worth the fight?
Or is there nothing i can do but to take flight?

yay!

Yay!!! I have finished my final exams. Bye bye NUS, I will miss you, i think. Four years of Uni-education over, past, just like that.

Met up with the RH gang yesterday. We had great steak at Black Angus followed by some coffee at the Starbucks beside the resturant. Black Angus still has the greatest steak in town. Noone else beats them i guess. Si bei bestest!

Spent sometime catching up and talking about the good old freshman days in RH. Pretty funny when we look back on our past "exploits". How time flies, it had been 3 years?!! Kinda miss those days... Its funny how much of a coincidence the four of us got together. I know Eugene from Sispec. Actually i only got to know him because both of us recoursed BSLC and we ended up in the same section, sharing our stupid nonsense. The "must be us" syndrome. I never knew I would still be in touch with him after army, so its kinda amazing. Then, Engkiat was my JC classmate. One of the dudes I can talk to. Oh yeah we both share the same love for the band The Smashing Pumpkins.

So the story starts off with Engkiat and I planning to be roommates in RH. Somehow he got in and i didn't. So Kiat is left without a roommate and me without a room. Meanwhile, Eugene got a room too and was basically spamming the whole NUS freshman community looking for a roommate. I saw the mail and go hey... isn't that my sispec buddy eugene. So i arranged for Kiat and Eugene to be roommates. Both of them got a room in RH and their neighbour so happened to be Rayner, Kiat's army camp-mate. Ray got a room, but did not have a roommate. Meanwhile my appeal was successful and heyo, Kiat suggested why not Ray and I be roomates. Ok so we ended up as room mates. The rest, was just history....

Looking forward to the next meetup.

A Certain Romance

You know, oh it's a funny thing you know

We'll tell 'em if you like

We'll tell 'em all tonight

They'll never listen Cause their minds are made up

And course it's all okay to carry on that way

I said no Oh no!

Oh you won't get me to go!

Anywhere, said anywhere I won't go

Oh no no!