Is your future really in your hands? Hmmm... I would like to think so. However, at this point of time, this statement seemed to slowly fade away from the truth as I see my future slowly slipping away from my control.
Why? I feel very tired of playing this what do you want to be, what are your career objectives kinda game. What is wrong? Am i too weak, too sheltered, ignorant or afraid? Fuck I feel lousy.
I am applying for engineering positions not because I like/love engineering, but simply because I feel that I have no other fucking options. I don't like approaching people, being pretentious and try to sell them stuff. So sales-related jobs like insurance and financial planning is out for me. I thought of working in a bank but no-one would interview me. I think its because I have absolutely no finance or banking or what kinda business background or even general knowledge. What else can I do man. How?
Now I fear forever being condemned to a technical position which I won't be good at and suffering with a job that I will not like for the rest of my life. This sucks. It is destroying my life, robbing me of my sleep, and turning me into a moody, melancholic piece of shit that no-one likes to talk to.
ok I am ranting, shoot me.
Showing posts with label rants. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rants. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Waking up to a kaleidoscopic mind,
a heart of emptiness u will find.
With every hour the clocks chime,
sometimes i felt really lost in time.
Come on does it really matter,
when everything seemed torn and tattered.
A lonely soul in a group of endless chatter,
always tasteless although from the same platter.
Clinging on to that little hope,
something small but it helps me cope.
Fear engulfs everytime I probe,
it felt like being on the wrong end of that breaking rope.
a heart of emptiness u will find.
With every hour the clocks chime,
sometimes i felt really lost in time.
Come on does it really matter,
when everything seemed torn and tattered.
A lonely soul in a group of endless chatter,
always tasteless although from the same platter.
Clinging on to that little hope,
something small but it helps me cope.
Fear engulfs everytime I probe,
it felt like being on the wrong end of that breaking rope.
Monday, April 30, 2007
Bored....
Boring boring boring boring boring....
Its 1.39am and yet i can't get to sleep... too much on my mind...
Seems like nature has a way of throwing shit at me...
Its late into the night.
Sleepless despite trying with all my might.
Is it really worth the fight?
Or is there nothing i can do but to take flight?
Its 1.39am and yet i can't get to sleep... too much on my mind...
Seems like nature has a way of throwing shit at me...
Its late into the night.
Sleepless despite trying with all my might.
Is it really worth the fight?
Or is there nothing i can do but to take flight?
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